Feeling pretty good today.. One of those days where I woke up on the right side of the bed! Though I'm having abit of a lazy day though.. Its 3.10pm and I'm taking my first bath of the day. My bed aint made yet,the dishes aren't washed yet.. Shoot me!! But I'm feeling pretty good today. Uhm there's not much I wanna say just wanna share how my day is going. Iv BEEN eating all day... Sies the weight that I'm gonna gain though!!! So Iv decided Monday ima go jogging (after iv had good food for easter weekend). Anyhu,blog later

Xoxoxoxoxo

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I wish aomeone would take me to a place like this... Id love to spend  a day looking at this view... to soul search.. its beautiful...

Letting go

I had such a rough night last night... once again,I cried til I feel asleep. Contemplating on the idea of letting go of someone that meant sooooo much to me. As much as the idea of it hurts so bad. Iv spent 2 months crying over him,pathetic most would say..thats just how i feel..but sometimes letting go  is actually the best thing you can do..I woke this morning with a clearer mind. iv been having these battles between my mind and my heart. my heart lies with him...but my mind seems to make more sense. its about that time to let it all go...the love,the past...him..  Theres a song by a lady called Heather (forgot her surname) - In my mind. she says "If you love something you've got to let it go..and if it comes back then it means so much more...but if it never does,at least you will know that it was something you had to go though to grow" ... I shed a tear when I heard this song during my breakup,but when I think about it,there is so much truth in those words... Its time to let go and let live! and grow... This is just a way of showing me that better things await me.

Love is a bullshit feeling,but its beautiful too... i dont regret loving him. I actually aprreciate him and grateful that I got to have him in my life for sometime... :) I hope one day he gets to read my blog to know how i felt/feel. He has contributed to who I am and what il be...

Words of a fucked heart

How do you let go of something/someone that you love so much!? Nothing in the world hurts more than needing to let go...in my life I have never went through such difficulty with the phrase "let go". but sometimes we cant have everything our heart desires... Life just doesnt work that way. Somethings are taken away from us to let us know that there is something better out there... May not seem so true now,but later in life it shall reveal itself... and i know that one day Il thank God and appreciate this experience for it will make me a stronger person and the reward will await me..someone better. But for now,it still hurts... my heart still loves...trying to let go but feels almost impossible... I want to be happy again. Im so sick of tearing up all the time when little things remind me of what was... and what is no longer...

Typing this with teary eyes

Pictures to describe the way I feel

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There is alot going on in my life...but at the same time,nothing is going on in my life.... I am not happy with the way things are going for me... i find myself asking many questions like "why am i here" "what is my purpose" "will anything go right for me". I once had dreams and visions set out for what I wanted this year to be for me... i wanted to go to school,pursue singing,have a great relationship with a 'better-half'" etc... all the things i had set out for myself just seemed to fail. BOOM..explosion right in my face.Everything... If i could turn back the hands of time i really wouldve loved things to turn out differently for me.

I feel like life is at a stand still,theres no zest for it anymore...nothing to look forward to... Im so young and i really hate feeling like this. All the other people my age have goals,dreams and visions..and me? Well.... *sigh* I dont know... i really think I need to do a lot of soul searching,to heal myself from all the rubbish that went wrong and to find where I wanna be,who I wanna be...What I wanna be.